Pruning the dead twigs in my heart

I've been on my own in the last week. In the last few days, I've been watching a  number of Joyce Meyer YouTube videos.

Joyce Meyer is an American preacher, who has a her own television network and series of Christian teaching resources.

Joyce Meyer:
Living in God's Timing (Part 1).

I was just listening to her teaching today, and how God had pruned her at the time she was working for a local church,  with her own special little ministry, and her own little Bible group.

God had given her a dream and vision that she will one day be writing and preaching to many people,  with a tape teaching resource ministry (technology in those days).

In the year she was called into the her vision, she did not serve for 12  months. God had to deal with her pride, and to prepare her both mentally and emotionally before she could enter this new level of ministry.

She explained that God had to prune her from all the dead and broken twigs in her heart, and deal with the pride that was in her before releasing her back to work for Him.

I found this explanation very humbling, as her words struck me with how if God tries to use circumstances to humble such a high profile preacher, what more it is for us lowly normal church goers like me.

Although I've been writing about this all this while, tonight I finally have to confront the discomfort of the news that I've come to dread facing.... 

God has his reasons when He wants us to give up things at certain points of time when He wants us to. It is not easy, and I dread the thought, as I am trying to face my personal sense of loss, that I now no longer have anyone to fight with which I have been so used to.

I pray that God will give me the strength to finally confront letting go of my dreams, and to trust that He has a better plan for me than I could ever imagine...