Reflections: After Thunderbolts

I haven't thought about my cats in a very long time. 

But in his graciousness, God allowed my cats to pass away during lunar new year. 

When my cats passed away this year, in my heart of hearts, I knew it was the hand of God moving me into a new direction. 

But it hasn't come in the way I expected.

It came in the way of a movie invite back in May, when I watched Thunderbolts.

Thunderbolts- a movie about wellness and mental health. Wrapped in the form of a Marvel Avengers superhero movie. 

And that was when everything started to emerge and unravel. 

Who would have known that a movie on mental health would have been a precursor or a "signal" to what I am now experiencing?

Why had this then became the start of a new chapter of my life?

Because for more than 100 days, I had spent grieving for the death of my two cats.
It was something I had made myself do in memory to them, and for them.

For 7 years, my life was wrapped around looking after Blackie and Thor.

It was never about myself. Even in grief, I had difficulty letting go of my two beloved pets that I spent so much time fussing around them. 

But in the graciousness of time, God knew it was time for me to let go...

Inner Healing Starts:

This is when the start of a new chapter begin. 

To finally find an avenue where I could start inner healing.

For 12 years, I had left home to Australia. 

To be self sufficient. The need for independence. 

And then I started bouldering.

And then there was Case...

Who would have known that meeting Case would have started that journey of self healing that I desperately need to finally face my self ?

Case isn't just a climbing partner. He may have not have known, but Case became the mirror

I didn't even know I needed to meet so I could start healing my inner child.

And we will save that for another story...